Tomorrow

In the morning I always feel melancholic.
I have to give in a huge project on Thursday which I haven't really begun, and I don't really know where to. So instead I listen to Avril Lavigne's first album, which is one of my favorite albums of all time. I hold so many memories in every song, it's like travelling in time when I hear them. It makes me unmistakably sad to reminisce time when I was there, and so, so happy. It shouldn't hurt so much to remember the past, but it just seems like it was a different person's life, not mine. How could I have lived there and felt happy being away for so long, in touch with a completely different reality? It shocks me everyday how those five years I lived in Jerusalem affected me. At the same time I feel like I'm completely exaggerating and completely not. The amount of memories, or lack thereof, that I hold from there is painstaking, and affects me every single day of my life. And it's almost been four years. But I still hold it in my heart. Am I lost in the past?